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At least one in three people has an introverted personality. Susan Cain’s new book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, discusses the problems introverted people face in our society. Cain believes society has created an extrovert ideal that has spread to schooling, child-rearing, and relationships. This ideal states that […]

Authentic communication is an art that demands not only that we voice our own needs and opinions, but also that we genuinely listen to others. ‘Speaking to’ someone is much different than ‘speaking with’ someone. ‘Speaking with’ someone requires a shift in perspective from one of control to one of collaboration. ‘Speaking with’ someone requires

In her book, Living Well, Despite Catchin’ Hell, Dr. Melody McCloud gives wisdom that applies equally to medicine and to interpersonal relationships. In medicine and in relationships we must strive first to do no harm. Cutting off communication and intimacies can seriously damage your relationship. For example, women sometimes withhold sex as punishment or use

We all know friendships are important to our happiness, wellbeing, and personal growth. A new book, Two Plus Two: Couples and Their Couple Friendships, by Geoffrey Greif and Kathleen Holtz Deal, delves into the realm of the importance of couples being friends with other couples. Couple friendships help us grow as individuals and strengthen our

Conventional wisdom often limits our chances at finding solutions for pressing issues. There is value to approaching common issues from fresh angles. Stephen Dubner, co-author of “Freakonomics”, argues the president has a limited scope to his abilities, and obsessive focus on the president takes time away from other very worthy stories. Susan Cain, author of

When we compare ourselves with others, we can choose to copy their positive qualities or be jealous of them. Negative comparison can lead to envy, jealousy, and lowered self-esteem. Avoid negative comparisons; instead, focus on your strengths, and if you must compare yourself to someone, choose a person from whom you can learn. Instead of

Successful relationships take daily attention to keep them strong. Compliment your partner, be compassionate regarding his or her foibles, and do one special thing for your partner every day. Let go of having to be right. When you’re arguing, take time to cool off. If your spouse is annoying you, do not complain to friends

It is important in any relationship to compromise. However, some people are so accustomed to sacrificing themselves to please others that they fail to recognize what they really need or desire. Consistent sacrificing and conforming damages a person’s integrity and self-worth. The more this behavior is indulged, the more reliant on it a person becomes.

In 1987, Dr. David Herzog at Massachusetts General Hospital started a research study called the “Longitudinal Study of Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa.” The 246 women participating in the study received treatment including psychotherapy, medical monitoring, and nutritional counseling. They were interviewed regularly about eating habits, health, school, work, and social activities. The majority improved,

Studies show allowing friendships to fade away in stressful times is harmful to mental, emotional, and physical health. During turbulent times, stress hormones spike. Being with a friend reduces the levels of these negative hormones. Friends can also help increase life span. Psychologists estimate the chance of dying over a ten year period increases for