In our currently uncertain pandemic world, our stress levels are at an all-time high. What we hear on the news about how the disease affects so many people, plus the devastating effect on the economy, can really be unnerving. That anxiety can easily make its way into the home and affect your relationship.
Moreover, there may already be many relationship issues that we brought into this virus situation. These problems not only came with us into this current pandemic but may be getting worse. For example, couples have always argued over finances, but record levels of unemployment exacerbate this issue. Issues such as parenting differences or a couple’s sex life are amplified, especially since couples are stuck at home with nowhere to go. Partners will often have different perspectives over such issues and disagree over the best course of action.
On Different Sides
Sometimes though, couples find themselves on different sides of the precautions continuum. Particularly when it comes to avoiding potential infection from the coronavirus. While different stances on virus precautions might not have been a hindrance before, COVID-19 raises the stakes much higher.
So, what if your spouse or partner thinks it is safe to meet with friends or hang out in the backyard without wearing a mask? Or, you think that getting takeout is too risky right now because germs could be passed on, while your partner thinks it’s no big deal at all? These differences have the potential to become major sticking points with couples seeking to agree on the appropriate level of risk for them.
So how should you and your partner proceed?
Taking Steps to Resolve Relationship Conflict
For starters, it’s especially important that couples acknowledge that their conflict is rooted in a sense that their safety and security could be compromised. It may seem that the argument is over a small issue such as take-out. However, it’s helpful to recognize a deeper sense of fear and anxiety about this problem exists. This goes much deeper than whether or not to order a meal.
When you believe that your safety and security are at risk, you want to ensure that you are not in danger. Unfortunately, this can lead to your taking a rigid stance on the subject. Your partner might not understand. That, in turn, can create conflict.
To resolve the conflict, it’s necessary to find a compromise. The steps needed to find a coronavirus compromise actually don’t differ much from resolving other issues in a relationship. Here are some steps to take that can help.
1. Express your feelings about your concerns. Do so by using a soft-startup approach to the issue
2. Refrain from attacking or criticizing your partner.
3. Be mindful of all 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse when it comes to relationships.
4. Ensure you are not too worked up to appropriately engage with your partner. If you are upset, take a break and reschedule the discussion for another time in the near future.
5. Attempt to find a compromise with your partner after both of you have expressed yourselves and feel heard.
Resolving any kind of relationship conflict isn’t easy. Keep in mind that it might take several attempts to find common ground. However, it is possible to find an agreement about issues such as COVID-19. Together, you can work out and how to stay safe during this time.
Still, after following the above steps, you and your partner still can’t come to an understanding or determine the appropriate coronavirus precautions for you both, don’t hesitate to seek out couples counseling for additional support.
